Wanted: Employee for Entry Level Position

dignifiedrice:

The successful candidate will have a minimum of five years experience in a similar role, own their own transport, be related to someone I know and like, be proficient in Excel and kangaroo wrangling, have gold-plated nipples, and be willing to work full hours at minimum wage.

(via gallifreyian-dragon)



seotaijiandboys:

*fantasizes about living alone, healthy, bills payed, with a nice fenced in backyard for my dogs to play*

(via the-arcanine)


fantasticcatadventures:

A very spooky Zukey

fantasticcatadventures:

A very spooky Zukey

(via unimpressedcats)


andrvw:

black licorice isn’t a candy it’s a punishment 

(via bastille)


4 Types of Unhealthy Mother-Daughter Relationship

psych-facts:

onlinecounsellingcollege:

1. Bosom Buddies: This is where the mother wants to be her daughter’s best friend. The relationship is usually warm and close, and the mother prides herself on always being there to emotionally support and advise her daughter. Communication is open, honest and real – which can start to feel threatening as the daughter gets older and wants to erect appropriate boundaries. In this type of mother-daughter bond, the mothers lives vicariously through her daughter and find it hard to discipline appropriately (as she’s too enmeshed with her daughter’s life).

2. Boss and Subordinate: This is where the mother wants to dominate and control every aspect of her daughter’s life. She’s always giving her opinion, making demands, and requiring her daughter to follow her rules, or live up to the expectations she has set. She’s also rigid, harsh and may lack empathy. Although the daughter may comply in her younger years, she is quietly resentful and will likely rebel – either strongly and loudly, or in a more passive way. She may feel she must be “perfect”, have low self-esteem and fear rejection and judgement by others.

Read More

(via psych2go)



viviku:

gothfabio:

ricktimus:

Probably my favorite thing about Bob’s Burgers is that they don’t do that thing where the characters try to one-up each other with an endless barrage of jokes? No, the characters react like actual people instead. They actually laugh or chuckle when somebody says something actually funny and/or weird. They stop mid-sentence. They do double-takes. And it all feels so very natural, because that is exactly what common people do. And that is such a refreshing change of pace, when you consider the fact that the norm in these things is to have jokes relentlessly thrown at you at break-necking speed.

also the comedy doesn’t rely on the parents hating and berating eachother idk i love that

it shows how you don’t need to be offensive to be funny

general banter is the best way to write dialogue

(via like-he-would-for-the-good)


The funny thing about introverts is once they feel comfortable with you, they can be the funniest, most enjoyable people to be around. It’s like a secret they feel comfortable sharing with you. Except the secret is their personality

missingkitsune:

"There there, I’m sorry I scared you. *pats and kisses* you’re a good dog, good dog."

missingkitsune:

"There there, I’m sorry I scared you. *pats and kisses* you’re a good dog, good dog."

(via colorfangs)


thisdanobrien:

lustyloveylady:

This is still one of the most perfect adaptations ever made

There has never been a more succinct display of an adapter perfectly understanding everything that makes a piece of source material great than Edgar Wright’s decision to put “DRUM” on the kick-drum for Crash and The Boys’ set.


nontarian:

If I’m a sarcastic asshole when I talk to you its either because I really like you and feel comfortable teasing you

Or I really hate you and don’t care if you know it

Good luck figuring out which one

(via joshpeck)


matociquala:

I did not see that coming.

(via joshpeck)


Can someone please get me a German Shepard? They’re absolutely the cutest dogs ever. I want one so badly.


2spooky4boo:

Restroom air dryers are a great way to warm your hands before wiping them on your jeans

(via herecomescountchocula)